Sam I Am

What's the best thing about your mom?

Her strength of faith.  Whenever troubles come, I can hear her calm and sing-song voice reassuring me to stick to what is right.  Her faith at all times is what we've all come to depend on, and something I am aspiring to build for myself.  Knowing the type of relationship she has with God, lets everyone who knows her, that they can have that too.  Mom, I love you!

"A man's reach should exceed his grasp,
Or what's a heaven for?"

I am humbled today.  I fear that in a world of instant gratification at the touch of a button, I have become a complacent complainer.  After reading that quote yesterday it has been haunting me.  Am I one of those people who complains when I'm asked to just lift up my arm?  Am I expecting everyone else to change and not willing to do a thing myself?  Have I become a glutton, demanding more of others than I expect of myself? 

As a child, I loved and was inspired by the story of 'A Christmas Carol'.  I was especially enchanted by the Spirit of Christmas Present - a jovial, large being who embodied all the joy and goodwill of the day, while sheltering those in want.  He was a beacon to me and a challenge to do more, to reach higher, to seek out those in need, exceeding my comfort zone and my grasp. 

Now, I am revisiting the concept and questioning, am I still reaching higher for others?  Am I putting their needs ahead of my own?  The concept of Heaven is a rewarding place of peace, love, and joy.  If this gift is offered to me, should I not then be willing to do my part to establish good habits, reach to build character and integrity within myself, and to serve my fellow man? 

It isn't about protecting our people from ourselves, it's reaching beyond to help others, and in the chain of being, have them reach out and help us.  Have we, as a North American society lost this concept, or is the question just too painful to think about?

In the words of Scarlett O'Hara, "I can't think about it today, I'll think about it tomorrow, because tomorrow is a brand new day!"  But Scarlett, my dear, tomorrow will anyone give a _____?
anne

Today during the appeal, the Crown Attorney in the case of second degree murder of Elizabeth Bain, withdrew the charges against Rob Baltovich.   Why?  Insufficient evidence.   Anyone sitting in the courtroom all those years ago at the preliminary hearing could have said as much then - key witnesses that were hypnotized to 'remember',  discounting that the driver seen driving Elizabeth Bain's car had long blond hair (Bernardo?) while photos taken of Rob at the time showed very short dark brown hair, a judge for the trial that outwardly demonstrated at least 17 times his personal biases, etc.  So, the question is raised again, why? 

Careers were made over this case.  Authorities were pressured to 'find the murderer' while under the cloud of the then Scarborough Rapist, later found to be Bernardo (who incidentally went to the same U of T campus as Rob and Elizabeth).  The assumption that because many times it is the boyfriend/husband it has to be this time too.  The need for closure as the loss of a young life is just too painful for society to bear, the need for blame and justice.  Hasty decisions has made the innocent pay the price once again.

As a mother, my heart aches for what the Bain family have lost when Elizabeth was taken.  No one should have to endure such a loss.  As a friend, my heart aches for what Rob and his family have endured all these years.  There is 'closure' for one and heartache for another.  But in the end, all of us are victims of this crime.  Rob has lost so much more than just 18 years.  He can now turn to re-build and find himself, but the years the locusts have eaten can only be returned by God.

Lesson learned?  Not really sure right now, except we all need to look before we leap and that the truth does indeed set you free.  But what is most important?  Free at last, free at last, Thank God Almighty, Rob is free at last!

Go in peace Rob, prayer has been answered.

anne

What is your "role" in your family?

My role(s)??? Well, you asked, and they are not necessarily in this order and ALL of them on any one day:

Wife, mother, daughter (of God and parents), shoulder to cry on, nurse, therapist, doctor, vet, chef, laundress, maid, child/youth worker, specialist in special needs, gardener, chauffeur, organizer, negotiator, teacher,  confidant, friend, companion, history holder, world interpreter (to high functioning autistic child),  entertainer, cruise director, punching bag, dog walker, mechanic, inventor, actor, spiritual advisor, gym coach, tear wiper, heart holder, scapegoat, 'mean one', disciplinarian, artist, decorator, party planner, events coordinator, best friend and love.

Perhaps there's more?  These are just off the top of my head!  So, at the end of the day, when I say my prayers and lay down my head, I've stopped asking 'Who am I' and in joyful submission, asking, "Who would You like me to be?"  The core essence never changes, just need to know what hat to wear and have never been happier. 

So, that's my role, just simple, me!

anne
(wife, working mom of two wonderful children, dog-owned)

We're entering into that season again - Christmas!  Just the name gets me singing.  But, because of our children, I've really gotten to thinking about this holiday, their past hurts help me to see past all the things I usually take for granted...
 
This year the decorations are going up, the baking will get done, the presents bought/wrapped/exchanged, but what else?  So many people write off this time of year as commercialism and in many ways they are right.  But, looking past that, it's a time of simplicity - a poor child lying in a manger, a time of humility - no beautiful cradle and family looking on, a time of love - a gift of ultimate sacrifice that wasn't needed, but given out of love greater than we can imagine.

So, as I sit here in the glow of my just-installed lights, dog sleeping by the fire,  I am reminded, and honoured, that such a gift was given.  A gift that I do not deserve, but one that I will accept, Grace.  It is amazing.
anne

Ringtones: What's yours and how often do you change it? 
Submitted by enrico.  

Ringtones???? I'm still trying to figure out how to check messages!  But, in the case that I do figure it out, I'm partial to the pirate, "ring-a-ding-dingy"!  Kind of like me!
anne

Pirate Ringtone

"Expert"->  X= Mathematical Equation for Unknown, Spurt= Drip under pressure, therefore an Expert is an unknown drip under pressure.

Audio: Share a song that evokes a powerful memory. 
Submitted by MalieKai.

Have to say, "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen!!!  While driving my then boyfriend, now hubby, home one night, I told him I liked that song.  He was surprised that I even knew it... being the 'alternative' chicky that I was, even that seemed a bit, 'not like you'.  So,... there going over the Rouge River bridge with the windows down, at midnight in the middle of the summer, I sang it for him... yup, top of my voice, guitar brigdges and  opera solos included!  Have to say he was mightily impressed!  Perhaps that's what made him so sweet on me???
anne

Do you have a pet? What kind of pet do you own, and why did you choose it? 
Submitted by Brendz.  

We have a 54lb Catahoula Leopard x German Sheperd dog.  Sam-I-Am is 4 years old and was bought from the local pet store - no she was not a puppy mill pup.  It took many long years pre-marriage and post to convince my husband that we NEEDED a dog.  I finally gave up and that's when he told me that there was a puppy in the local shop I needed to look at.  Of course, it had to be exotic and the poor thing was bullied by a mean beagle sharing her kennel.  Upon taking our two children to see her, my son walked into the store, not knowing which puppy it was, scoped out the pups and parked his 4 yr old behind right in front of a kennel.  He declared, "I want that black and grey one."  It was Sam.  After a week's holiday up north, we discovered our darlin was still at the shop and her price was greatly reduced.  We took her home the same day.  Some may say fate, I say divine intervention. 

Our darlin son is special needs and can rage up to 8 hours a day.  Sam-I-Am alerts us to his change of mood 10-15 minutes before he blows and on some occasions has licked his face and gotten him redirected when none of us could and diverted another long episode.  She was never taught this and it took several times of her nudging us and then him before we silly humans realized what she was telling us.  She checks on the adult's wellbeing who is working with our son and kisses us often.  Sam also goes up to our darlin when he is calmed down, sniffs him (for the chemical changes that happen with these ups/downs), and then proceeds to kiss him and reassure him that she still loves him.  What an amazing example of grace!

More than once she has reminded me that there are more important things here on earth than the trivial.  Sam is truly a blessing and has preserved our sanity throughout these diffcult years.  She knows when to be silly and when to lick away our tears.  Who needs the Almighty to speak from the heavens, when He's told us plain as day, "To my children, enjoy, from your Heavenly Father, with love."

anne

Well, I've done it.  I gave the kiddies to my darling husband and had this time to read the last of the saga.  Perhaps it was that I'm not feeling so well - got the cold from the kiddies - but I had mixed views on this whole Potter thing...

As a series of books exploring the realms of good/evil and the 'greater good', I'd have to say they were well written for that.  In fact, the teacher in me began a unit for a grade nine class to read the Potter books, contrast to Corrie ten Boom's writings, and place it all within the backdrop of WWII (curricular requirement here in Canada in gr. 9).  The idea of placing an analysis of 'breaking the rules' at this age group is very appealing to me, but alas, I don't teach high school.  I've grown rather fond of Harry and company and am glad to see that Rowling has kept redemption and clear lines of good/evil right to the end.  (Harry uses disarming spells instead of the unforgivables)  As for those fellow Christians who point out about the whole use of 'rule bending' I must say that in light of reality and her placing this story in the clear choices between right and wrong, Harry does well to live up to a reputation of integrity. 

But, I was greatly disturbed by the amount of violence.  Upon reading the first few chapters of the last book, I was so upset I had to put it down for awhile... Because I can't tolerate it?  No, because I was disturbed by the fact that in droves, children 10 to 12 years were buying the book and in a way, their 'innocence' was being stripped as Harry's was.  This was unfair.  The salesclerk in the store assumed our children (9 and 12) were buying Harry and was surprised to learn that they were purchasing Nancy Drew and Geronimo Stilton instead.  Yes, parents have a duty to guide their children, but these books were originally made out to be for younger children and I wonder of those parents how many have read all the books!  I love the idea that the original readers of Harry were in their late teens/early 20s to read the final book, but what about the new readers just coming into the series?  Rowling has an obligation, I feel, to her public in this.  When a book is being promoted near the children's section and trick-or-treat costumes are placed beside it, what are children and parents to think?

Overall, I'm glad to have met Harry and to have read his story.  It has given me a clearer way to view good/evil and to teach anew to my children and students, the place of authority, rules, love, forgiveness, and remorse.  As a Christian, I can't see my darlins reading this series until much later (daughter declared she wanted to be 16 to read the first one -hee hee, we'll see) and then doing it as a read-aloud on our family book nights.  Darling husband and I want to discuss the roll of witchcraft, rules, and the like with them.  Part of me doesn't want them to have to experience loss as they read along with Harry, as they've seen enough loss in their own lives before we adopted them.  The other part of me wants to show them an example of resiliancy and integrity.  At least for now, we'll wander the dusty hallways with Nancy and have high flying adventures with Geronimo.  We can try to give them a more peaceful world to grow up in where the hero isn't always in mortal peril, and the griefs are not going to hit as close to home as Harry's will.

In the end, "all is well".  Well said Rowling, well said.